when the going gets tough

It seems easiest to take photos of the happy moments, or to blog about life's little victories. Even ancient kings only kept records of wars they had won...

But for the record, today is one of those days when I'm making a note of the many days of misery that go along with having a little baby. Yesterday Teg took naps. Today she is struggling to take any, and is overtired, crying and fussy. Today I don't like being a Mom. I am not having fun, and I feel a failure. Reading books doesn't help too at times like this: each book has a different set of "things to do" with trouble-shooting pages which basically say "your problem is that you are not fully committed to my method... if you were more committed, your child would feed/sleep etc better". So, feeling sleep-deprived and desperate already, my brain reads this as "you see, it's YOUR fault that your baby isn't sleeping/eating..."

What then does the pursuit of godliness look like at a time like this? I was reading 1 Peter 2 this morning: like newborn babies, crave the pure spiritual milk of the word so that you may grow in your salvation. Oh my goodness.... Much grace is required just to make it through the hour, never mind the day.